an untold birth story: carter lee young 11.12.12 {part 1}

exactly a week before carter was born, daron's farfar (grandfather) passed away. the night before his funeral, i had not felt carter move and it had me worried. i woke up that next morning even more worried because i hadn't felt him at all throughout the night. i had really bad insomnia with carter my 3rd trimester. it was not uncommon for me to lie awake for hours at a time in the middle of the night. 

that night i was up as usual but carter's kicks and turns were absent. on our way to farfar's funeral service, i told daron i was worried. he tried to help me stay calm but i made the decision that if i didn't feel carter move by the end of the funeral service, i would go straight to the midwife clinic to get a non-stress test. we stopped at a gas station, bought some orange juice and treats in hopes to give carter a surge of energy and i tried to take lots of deep breaths and tell myself that everything was fine.

the end of the service came, i had felt a few movements but they were very spaced out and lacking the normal "umph" i was used to. we decided it was best for me to get the non-stress test while daron and his family went to the burial. the nurses at the clinic immediately hooked me up to all the monitors i needed and made me feel right at home. i worried they would think i was a looney from crazy town but everyone made me feel so comfortable which i really appreciated. 

about three quarters of the way through, a nurse came into me and asked, "are you aware that you are contracting?" 

whhhaaattt? i was shocked. 

she pointed to my chart and showed the up and down line showing my contractions and added with a chuckle, "yeah! they are pretty strong ones too!" 

i was so confused. i wasn't feeling anything in my belly, how could i be contracting? suddenly, bing! a light bulb went off. the entire week, i had been complaining to daron that my back was having the "oddest pains" that were really hard to describe. i just kept saying, "my back keeps scrunching like an accordion - it's so weird." the pain would come and go and so i didn't think much of it. the nurse confirmed that this odd sensation i had been feeling was indeed contractions. she also informed me that carter was okay and it's actually common for babies to get quiet to save energy for their big debut! i was surprised by all of this information because i was a little over a week out from my due date and had already convinced myself i would be late.

the next day was a saturday. daron's family was still in town and so we had dinner together at zupas. still to this day, that dinner chalks up to be the second best meal of my life. i gobbled up a full sandwhich, a salad, my chocolate strawberry, bread roll, and a whole piece of turtle cheesecake and still had room. after i finished i was lookin' around like, "so, where's round 2?" daron was staring at me in disbelief. for 3 months, i couldn't put more than 10 bites in my mouth at a time because my stomach was so squished. i didn't realize then, that that was my last meal before my son would be born!

after dinner, the family headed over to daron's and my house to watch a movie. we joked about how maybe steve and linnea (daron's mom and dad) shouldn't get on their flight tomorrow morning because i might go into labor! 

well... it turns out that's exactly what happened. except for the part where steve and linnea don't get on their flight...

during the movie (transformers), i had daron write down the times i was having contractions. i could tell they were stronger and more frequent. still occuring very randomly, i shrugged them off and fell right asleep. 

2 0' clock in the morning rolled around and i woke up to a strong contraction that shocked me. i had to breathe through it in the fetal position, there was no confusion this time of what it was. i had no idea that this contraction would be the first of a slew of contractions that would be 4 mintues apart or less for the next 34.5 hours. i had one looonngg road ahead of me. 

i laugh thinking about the first hour of those contractions. daron was juggling counter pressure on me during each contraction, trying to help me stay calm, also asking me a zillion questions like, 

"is this the real deal?"

"should i call the midwives?" 

"should i call your mom?"

"should we tell my parents?"

"do you think this is it? like the real thing?"

i had no idea what to think and really all i could think about was getting through the next contraction. no laboring woman wants to declare she's in labor to realize it's false labor. i just kept telling him i didn't know and that i needed him every contraction to put counter pressure on my back because it was killing me. after a few hours of them being consistently 4 minutes apart, we decided to call my mom and tell her to hop on a plane and to fill in the midwives. my midwife assured us that she would be seeing us later that day with my contractions being the way they were. 

my mom hopped on the first flight available and was at the house by lunch time. daron's sister, anna, picked her up and drove her to our home. at this point, i had been laboring for about 10 hours. daron was applying a hot pad to my back during each contraction. i couldn't believe the pain in my back. it was unreal. i struggled with it because it never went away. it stayed in between the contractions and just really intensified during each one. the pain in my back far surmounted the pains i was having in the front.

the doula we started working with half way through my pregnancy proved to be very helpful during this time. i would text her in between contractions filling her in on the situation. she really guided me through the entire birth. she reminded me that i needed to eat or it was going to be bad later on and she encouraged me to rest as much as i could. i was incredibly nauseous and thought i might hurl if i took a bite of anything. 

daron went to the store and bought me chicken noodle soup and crackers while my mom took over. i can still remember my mom walking down the stairs to me, embracing me and then rubbing my back. i felt like my guardian angel had just arrived. it almost brought me to tears. 

i really can't describe what it was like to see her.

i said hi to daron's sister, anna, who peeked down at me from the stairs. i remember hoping i wasn't scarring her for life from having babies.

daron was exhausted and took a very long nap once he returned from the store. my mom was really helpful putting counter pressure on my back and distracting me from the contractions. a few hours later, my dear friend nicole and her husband blair stopped by to see me. they happened to be in town, found out i was in labor and came to say hi! it was the greatest thing. seeing them lifted my spirits. it was embarrassing because i was contracting in front of them and would have to pause the conversation every few minutes to breathe all weird to handle the contractions but i remember my contractions being less intense while they were there which felt so good.

it was around hour 18 that we started wondering how long this was going to go on for. i knew it wasn't time to go to the hospital because although my contractions were intense and consistent, they hadn't increased in intensity. they had been the same since the first one i felt at 2 in the morning. but i could tell i was getting so, very tired. my doula was really worried about me laboring through two nights without any sleep. we were about to go to the hospital so i could be checked. (i hadn't been checked prior to this so we had no idea where i was at). 

suddenly, i felt excruciating pain in my back from my shirt. i started screaming to my mom to get my shirt off. so confused, my mom hurried and lifted up my shirt and gasped. i had blisters all over my lower back. 18 straight hours of a hot pad had done damage and my back was burned. the sad part is, during the next contraction i begged her to put it in on my back because i didn't care. i could handle the hot pad burning my back if it meant the pain inside was less. but my mom wouldn't. 

i texted my midwife who told me to immediately get in the bath. i hadn't gotten in the bath prior to this because the bath can sometimes make a woman stop laboring, but at this point, i hoped it did stop my labor so i could get some sleep. 

i spent one hour in the bath and it was amazing. it still is incredible to me how soothing warm water was. and to my relief, my contractions went from 4 minutes apart to 6! i can't even tell you what a different those two minutes made. i had been refusing food all day but my mom finally convinced me to eat some of the crackers and chicken noodle soup in the bath. i forced some down but still was so nauseous. 

i remember that time in the bath being really wonderful. my mom and i had so much fun talking and laughing in between contractions. she washed my hair for me and helped me get all clean. then she blow dried my hair while i laid on the floor handling the contractions. i would later look back on that time and be so grateful i got that bath in before carter came. i had no idea then how hard it would be to take a shower once he was here!

around midnight, we woke daron up and told him it was time to go to the hospital and get me checked. my midwives really wanted to know where i was at. the drive over was awful, but the hospital was even worse. laboring under those awful lights with monitors all over me was terrible. i knew inside that i wasn't far, and so i just wanted to go home. 

the nurses finally checked me and after 24 hours of consistent labor, 

i was dilated to 2.5 cm...

i truly wasn't surprised at all. i knew i wasn't far. i could feel it. still, i was getting depressed being in that hospital. my mom tried to cheer me up with a sees candy sucker but i didn't want anything to do with it. i was feeling down and incredibly exhausted. 

before we left, i remembered a random birth story i had read months ago that always stuck with me. the woman in the story had a 52 hour labor and took a pill that let her sleep. she slept 7 hours after taking the pill. i told my nurse and she knew what i was talking about. i told her to please give me the pill and let me go home. 

i popped the pill on the way home and fantasized about 7 hours of sleep. i stumbled into the house ignoring all of daron's and my mom's questions and headed straight for our bed. i had convinced myself i was going to sleep like a rock for a long time. 

i did sleep like a rock, but not for long...

after 2 hours, i woke up to a whole new kind on contractions.

active labor contractions... and so the real fun begins!

{to be continued...}

{are you still reading?!?!?! ha!}