thumbelina turns 2!

isn't it great that this picture makes me LAUGH really hard. it was even funnier to see it saved under "chopped thumb" on my computer. every time i see it i think it looks like somebody just took an ax to it.
now that would be a story eh? a lot better than lamo wake surfing. oh well.

thumbelina and i really have grown close over these past 2 years. even though it does have an annoying callous that i cannot seem to get rid of and it sort of really drives me crazy we seem to bond quite nicely. no complaints. and today was extra special i tell you. thumbelina has gotten extra kisses and massages all day long from daron. this is heaven people. for some weird reason it feels so so good to have someone rub thumbelina forever. (to my dismay daron usually lasts 30 seconds...if im lucky. not today though! :) it gets almost claustrophobic and just like it needs to break free or something. like it has a head in there that just needs to pop out. i realize that may sound strange but what can i say. it's what im feeling.

so far my absolute favorite use of thumbelina is-

yes. ellie layne's binkie. oh baby, i just can't get enough of it. its a win win. my 1/2 a thumb calms her down (believe it or not) while she munches on it. and this feels incredibly good. if thumbelina came just so i could calm my babies down i am seriously okay with that.

my favorite part of introducing her to others is...when almost everyone (seriously, almost everyone) says "oh well it's a good thing you are right handed!! hahaha!" then i awkwardly say "uhh yeah i am actually left...
awkward pause...
i had no idea how rare us left handers are!

what is most interesting is to go back and read in my journal my thoughts right after this event happened.

(chicken scratch will be explained)

for some reason i am feeling extra open today. so i would love to share with you my journal entry from july 18, 2009 (the very next day)

               Today I write with my right hand b/c I can't write with my left. Yesterday my thumb got ripped off while I was waking surfing at powell. Can you believe that? I'm missing my left thumb now. I want to write a lot and say every detail of what happened and how I'm feeling but it's really difficult with my right hand. So I think I'll just get the main points down. 

I think I'm still in shock about what happened.  But truly I am okay. I can honestly say w/ in my heart I am not mad or angry that this happened to me. I understand that life has events like these. All that matters is what I do from here. I can't do anything about the freak accident...but I can control how I handle it...

I know Heavenly Father knew this was going to happen to me. And I know he has been watching out for me. I asked him in my prayers tonight if I promised to do my best to stay positive and be of good cheer if I could have an angel look out for me during the dark moments that I am sure will come. I also asked him to pour blessings upon all of my family and friends that have been praying for me. I can't express enough how grateful I am for them. I have and feel so much love and support it is incredible.

There is no doubt that July 17, 2009 changed my life forever. But I know it will be for the better. I am strong. I can do this. I believe I can b/c I have the Savior and the atonement on my side. I know the atonement is real. It can and will heal me. I can become emotionally stronger if I rely on the Savior. He is there for me. And the best part is I know, one day, when I am resurrected I will get a new one :) how freaking cool is that. I love this gospel and I am so grateful it is a part of my life...I don't know what I'd do w/0 it...

Love always,

Dani Bree Pugmire

 as i typed that i am realizing that was quite a lot to write for a newly thumbless person. and if you are wondering why it is signed by myself i don't know really know why. i just made a habit of doing that in my journal ever since i started writing in one. so every journal entry ends like that. also, i am pretty sure it does not make a lot of "grammatical" sense but i wrote it word for word and hey, i was drugged. 

i am glad i was preparing for darker moments to come because oh boy did they come...the forced smiles while not being able to cut my own food, the barfing episodes and the very sad tears of when i first saw him (thumbelina switches from being a guy and a girl, just go with it). my favorite favorite part was telling Daron on his 23rd birthday that Heavenly Father did in fact send me an angel and that angel was him. words cannot express how grateful i am for that blessing He gave me. what a different experience it would have been.

well here is to 2 years thumbelina. i can't wait for the 108 more. how grateful i am for YOU and that you are ONLY A 1/2 OF A THUMB. i am very very lucky. TRUE amputees are my HEROES.

so long!